Grieving

Grieve: (verb) "To feel great sorrow or distress"

Not only do I find myself grieving over the loss of Kristen, but I find myself grieving the loss of the old Shannon.

I went to a meeting today, and kept waiting and watching for Kristen to come in and sit down next to me. She didn't. And that has to be OK, because that is life on life's terms.

Acceptance is a bitch sometimes.
A really mean, hurtful and harsh bitch.

I'm grieving over the loss of my hair.

Stupid and silly?
Maybe.
But whatever.

I'm not a hugely "feminine" woman. I'm a tomboy and a "comfortable" dresser. My hair was part of what made me feel girly and cute. And it's gone. Yes, it grows back. But it's just not happening quickly enough. And the hair around the incision site is still basically bald.

Blech.

But there are definitely things to be thankful for during this hard time....

Missy and Courtney will be in Eugene next Wednesday!
Kristen is at peace.
Harper is the cutest baby on the planet.
Long or short hair, I still have my wit.
My family is all healthy.
Our car works.
I have a freezer full of gourmet food.
And I don't have cancer.

Life is hard sometimes, but I honestly wouldn't trade mine for the world.